No Small Moments - October 11, 2026 - "Festering"

No Small Moments

“Festering”

©Hubcatstide2026

When I think about or hear the word “fester” I immediately think of Uncle Fester in The Addams Family. He is bald and has deep seated brown eyes surrounded by a dark purple circle. His smile is mischievous and creepy, yet there is something very childlike in him. He is playful, macabrely humorous, and lovingly loyal to his family. He wears a long thick black monk like greatcoat with an enormous collar. And Fester’s energy is literally electric. He can place a lightbulb in his mouth and valiha! It lights up! His niece and nephew adore him…the ladies run from him!

I also think about a sore festering knowing that is never a good sign. I am recovering from a stye in my right eye, and let me tell ya, that was a painful fester. My eyes had felt tired for a few days and I ignored it, like I ignore most physical pain. One would think I would have learned to pay attention to my own physical pain after ignoring to the point of transcending it in 2009 and now live with permanent nerve pain after an emergency C 5&6 fusion surgery saved my life. Nope. I just keep on keeping on and then boom, both eyes have pink eye and the right one a stye. It’s a lovely way to look when presiding over a Sunday Service. Thank goodness the pink had faded but the drainage from the festering and subsequent burst kept on flowing like a river of denial. I’m certain the congregation consumed less cookies at our coffee after the service. If anyone reading this was present on September 27th and trying to abstain from sweets, you’re welcome. Happy to help.

There is another fester that is vastly different from Uncle Eccentric and a stye and that is what happens when we ignore our feelings so we can avoid difficult conversations. There are no ifs and buts about it, unless one is a narcissist or sociopath, dealing with conflict is uncomfortable. Each person wants to be respected, valued, heard, and understood and that is normal and healthy. What begins the festering is when people ignore their feelings and time begins to infect the conflict to a boil. When we cannot go to sleep because we are rehearsing what we want to say, or when our minds drift from the present moment because we are rehearsing our case, the festering becomes a “defense” of armoring up, instead remaining open and humble. Then both parties become blinded by the spiritual stye in their own eyes and become blind to the fact that they are no longer looking at the issue clearly, they are looking at it through the lens of who they are in the moment.

Yesterday, Sunday the 27th, I stood on the chancel with love in my heart for my congregation, but I could not see them clearly because of the discharge clouding my eyes. The entire service was literally a blur for me as our AV Team encountered an issue that threw the service production a curve ball. Thankfully, even though my physical vision was blurry, my spiritual vision could clearly see the Spirit was leading me to create a freestyle singing and sharing service where folks popped in and out offering their gifts, insights, and answers to questions I would ask based on a line in a hymn we just sang. Several congregants spoke to me after the service and thanked me for the service. A few texted me later in the afternoon, one saying she and her husband, “really enjoyed the service this morning. Frustrating for some lol, we get it.” Honestly, I wasn’t personally frustrated. I felt the hurry to solve the problem energy from our AV people…and I get that. If something goes wrong n the service, our loving and dedicated AV Team feel responsible, but that isn’t always the truth. And at the end of the day, the minister holds all the responsibility for the order, disorder, and reordering of a service unfolding. That’s the deal when we sign the dotted line…and there are no caveats.

The truth is I am engulfed in the presence and leading of the Spirit so much sometimes that I skip over something in the Order of Service or forget it all together! Every person volunteering or paid accountable is a human being, and we need to remember this when the order becomes disorder trusting that the Spirit will lead a reordering for our highest good. Folks, conflict is a team sport for mutual understanding. It is an opportunity to dig deeper, see more than one view of something, and invite creative collaboration to achieve the highest purpose.

And the fact will always remain that the highest purpose is never for anyone to want to be right and win, because when that is the stove of the conversation, the feelings will boil and blur the vision and mission which for our purposes, is to embody holy love. The reflection for October 18th is titled, “What’s Love Got to Do with It?” I hope you’ll come and join me in the conversation as we watch Jesus move through conflict and learn from Paul how to see our way through it back to one another, back to love. Until then, if your eyes are tired, even the eyes of your heart, let me tell ya…don’t ignore either way of seeing because when we do, our lens gets covered in pus from our festering. Spiritual pus is just as gross, if not worse, and the needless damage can be permanent.

My advice to myself, “Traci, take the “I” out of it and pay attention to the “eyes” of your heart.” And may I add, festering stinks. Ahem…sharing for a friend named Sophia.

There are no small moments.

Traci Hubbard