Purposely Choosing

By Traci Hubbard

Romans 12:1-2 The Message and NRSV;

Colossians 3:12-17 The Good News

The book, The Last Temptation of Christ, begins with an unsettling discussion between John and Jesus. They are sitting in a hollowed-out rock above the River Jordan, and they have been arguing about what to do with the world all night long. John’s face and body language is hard and reactive, and his eyes are full of callousness. His arms are jerking up and down with a harshness as if he is chopping something to death. Jesus’ face is disciplined, approachable and cautious and his eyes are full of compassion.

Jesus asks John, “Isn’t love enough?”

“NO!” John’s anger is thick in his voice. “The tree is rotten. God called ME and GAVE ME the ax, which I then placed at the roots of the tree. I DID MY DUTY. NOW YOU DO YOURS. TAKE THE AX AND STRIKE.”

Jesus is thoughtful, choosing to be peace – to be full of peace – peaceful…he responds, “If I were fire, I would burn. If I were a woodcutter, I would strike, but I am a heart, and I love.”

In today’s global emotional tyrannical climate of greed, taking what one wants no matter the costs of lives and eggs, it’s easy to understand John’s anger. In Barbara Brown Taylor’s Book, God in Pain, (page 19), she writes about this scene saying, “It’s not hard to understand what John was going through.” At one time or another, everyone of us looked for the Sacred to come to us in another way. Most, if not all of us, have asked the Spirit to show up right now and answer our questions, soothe our pain, and tell us what we need to do right now to stop our hurting, to stop our fear, and to find hope to keep going. If we’re honest, we want the Holy to take over our minds and bodies and do the work for us, not understanding that we are giving away our human freedom for temporary security – to feel better.

Yesterday, I was thinking about the freedom and security in the Garden of Eden, in the two creation stories. These stories are filled with metaphorical meaning for us today. Every story in the bible was written by an oppressed patriarchal human lens, even those attributed to Esther and Ruth – humans writing about trying to understand who created them... why they were there, and how to connect with Mystery whose name they ruled never to speak aloud. Why the rule? Why keep secret that Divine Loving Energy extends itself to all people? Why so many soul taxing rules? I believe fear, fear of scarcity, fear of losing power, fear of being ordinary, and fear of uncertainty drives many a heart, nation, and sadly, many churches to seek security at any cost. How do we know what to believe? How do we decide what will be life giving and bring meaning to our lives? How do we know for certain? One thing I know each of us can say with certainty is that the Earth is not flat because if it were, cats would have already tossed everything off the edge.

We are human beings, hard wired with emotions, and sometimes, we all crave certainty. Every day each one of us begins by making simple choices – stretching, drinking a glass of water. Some of us connect our hearts and minds with LOVE before our feet touch the floor. Some of us begin our day with turning on the news. We can be certain that purposely choosing comes with the dawn, and underneath our choice is a longing for peace, for certainty.

Webster defines certainty as the quality or state of being certain especially on the basis of evidence. Webster defines peace as a state of quiet, freedom from the disturbance of war, and harmony in personal relationships. Folks, peace is not certainty. As Viktr Frankl teaches, we are free to choose our attitude, inner peace, in every circumstance, and during every uncertainty.

Certainty is the enemy of unity, tolerance, and love. When people purposely choose to exchange wedding vows, there is no absolute human certainty that the marriage will stay intact. Both people will change, grow, evolve or dissolve. Minds change, beliefs change, culture evolves, learns, adapts, invents, or it dissolves into a stagnant pool of toxic emotions.

Paul's letters to the churches in Rome and Colossae, in fact, every story in the Canon, has the thread of change connecting our stories with their stories.

Last week I met with Mae. She asked questions, shared some of her story, and with a gleam in her eyes, and a smile on her face, she spoke words of gratitude and hope around the necessary changes that are needed here, and how she is not only embracing the changes, the uncertainty, she is enjoying our unfolding and our creating something new together.

I also spent some time with Mike. I was strengthened by his journey of surrendering to uncertainty by connecting to the Sacred ‘s love imperfectly everyday of his life. He shared heart born words of changes in his theology and how his precious experiences with other humans have led him to embrace an incarnational lens. I thought a lot about Mike and Marg this week, and how one of the many gifts of Mike’s journey was discovering that purposely choosing to be at peace with reality empowers him to live and love more fully in the present.

Last Sunday, I spent some time with Anita and I witnessed gratitude and hope jump in her sweet blue wet eyes while she smiled and shared how much the support of family, friends, and all of you has held her in deep places, lifting her, giving her joy during grief.

Today, our uncertain times are not unlike the time in the garden of Eden… where certainty was weaved into everything – enjoy all of this, tend to and nurture all of this, and stay away from that because it’s too much for you to understand… and Adam, care for Eve’s highest good, make sure she doesn’t get carried away by doubt. What an aha moment for me… even when we are surrounded by certainty there is room for doubt. Doesn’t that seem strange? Why would Adam and Eve choose dualistic thinking in a place where all their needs were met? Why would Eve doubt she had everything she needed? Why would she think the Holy was holding back vital information?

Garden of Eden story:

Adam and Eve, all I have is yours.

Take care of each other. Enjoy the place, your lives, creation, lions, and tigers and bears, and oh my, just stay away from that tree, there’s some tricky stuff going on in that one.

How do we know Eve was a blonde?

She did not remember the directions, so she chose another way, and ended up at the wrong place, which is always the wrong time.

She listened too much.

She doubted too much.

She ate too much.

Then she shared too much of the trick she swallowed whole.

And by the way, I think Eve received an unfair rap…

The text reads, she turned and gave to Adam… he was right by her side, doing the exact opposite of what LOVE had directed him to do. He wasn’t caring for Eve… he was mesmerized by her “apples” – what if I lose those apples? I want those apples. Even in the Garden of Eden story, there is freedom to choose fear and greed… there is room to create uncertainty around the Holy’s heart towards us. In this story, in the stories of the congregations in Rome and Colossae, and in every human story since then, LOVE has given every human freedom to choose peace, to choose how we believe and show up for ourselves and others, to choose love.

We have freedom to purposely choose to be self-serving or self-giving. We have freedom to choose an attitude of scarcity and fear, or gratitude and peace. We are free to present ourselves to LOVE every morning and be renewed and nurtured in our souls. In other words, every morning, every moment of every day, even these dark crazy tariff spinning days, we are free to choose which apple we buy into and swallow whole.

The question before every human on the planet right now is who... who and what will we serve? Will we serve Sweet Mystery – Eternal Love we know (the Greek definition of “know” implies a very vivid understanding, a relationship between what is known and the knower) we know the Holy is with us by the evidence in our experiences and soul evolution that are certain, or will we choose ourselves that always leads to disillusionment in God’s heart towards us?

We are free to choose that Henry the 1/8th invented fractions. Up to you. Silly, right? No sillier than choosing fear. No sillier than thinking Holy Love is holding out on us during these chaotic times. No sillier than our refusal to exercise our freedom to choose the fruits of peace and love in all times.

Friends, God, by whatever name you give to God, the Sacred does not come the way we expect… like John expected in the story in my reflection opening. We may believe that Mystery has the power to open the sky and take bad people away in a cyclone, but that’s not the way the heart of divine love exists. It’s not an unhealthy thing to find ourselves in disillusionment. It’s never a negative thing to wake up and discover that we have mistaken a lie for the truth. Every time the Sacred lovingly refuses to satisfy our expectations, which creates space, and our idols are exposed to us to wake us up so we can understand what we are really serving and why.

The Holy is not the RCMP or a genie in a bottle for us to rub and then God will run and take us over, doing our work and turning us into love, empathy, advocates… into the fruits of the Spirit. We have been created human- we have hearts, minds, legs, feet, arms, hands, and freedom to choose who we become and how we show up every day in our brief time on the planet. We are free to choose how our energy effects our world.

It's true that history proves there is nothing new under the sun. Since the beginning of human history, people have lived in uncertain times. But don’t miss this… uncertainty offers us opportunities to connect to the only certainty there is which is the evidence that Divine Love has held you, held me, in every moment of our lives. You have purposely chosen a minister who doubts and misses the mark, and I have purposely chosen you. And, well, all I can say to Adam and Eve is how bout these apples! (pointing at the congregation) May we purposely choose to love first. May we choose the certainty of God’s love so that transformative love can be our wings, be our hands, be our feet, and be our hearts. May it be so, amen.